'Tis the Season

When you go to an end-of-the-year Christmas party, all dressed up in ridiculous red and greenery, almost finished with finals, and without a care in the world, there's only one thing on your mind. That's right, kicking the crap out of someone you just met so that everyone will know what a badass you are. And then getting your ass kicked by that same person because you're drunk and he's better at fighting than you are. And then causing a giant brawl in the street because your friends see you getting your ass kicked and punch a bystander on crutches in retaliation. And then getting beaten with that guy's crutches by his friends while everyone scrambles to break up the fight before the neighbors call the police.

The scenario I just described (and which I saw last night) is a refreshing reminder that people at my school have not forgotten the true spirit of Christmas, and of partying in general. Sure, parties can provide a fun atmosphere for people to forget about class for a few hours, play some drinking games, and get to know some people of the opposite sex, but we should always remember that they are really about the violence.

So when you go out to a house party this weekend, remember why you're there. Don't let the thought of pretty girls playing beer pong in short, red and green skirts distract you from the real goal of the night: lying face down in the road in front of someone else's house and getting beaten over the head with a crutch.